David Graves

August 29, 1949 - July 25, 2024

David is the love of my life. We met in Kenai, Alaska at a salmon cannery, working the summer fishing season. When we met for the first time, it was love at first sight. We knew we wanted to spend our lives together. And what a life together it has been, a dream life. We are both artists, so we created many works of art and pottery, which are in homes and collections all over the world. We lived in some of the most beautiful places in the world:  South Pasadena, California, Maui, Hawaii, San Miguel de Allende, Mexico, Antibes, France, and we traveled extensively. The end of the road for David was lymphoma cancer. He had been successfully treated in the past and enjoyed many healthy years in remission until the disease reoccurred in 2024.

Our greatest good fortune is our family and friends. They are the best circle of kind, supportive, interesting, energetic people you could hope for. Our parents on both sides, Jim and Alice Graves, Brian and Gayle Ducey were special beyond what I can express in words. They greatly influenced our lives and were wonderful role models.

David was all about freedom. He lived and breathed freedom. I feel fortunate that within his free spirit he, like me, yearned for a deep and lasting relationship. He loved to help people, and he often exhausted himself in the effort. He was funny, adventurous, courageous and loved to push the boundaries. David was a builder. He enjoyed wood-working - thank you Gary Penn - his favorite high school teacher who taught wood shop. Gary's class was the only class Dave enjoyed and didn't skip school for. His high school buddies like to recall seeing Dave in the back of a pick-up, skipping school and heading to the beach. Talk about a dream childhood, growing up in LA in the 60s! David loved music, it was his passion, all types of music. He got to go to concerts of many of the iconic rock bands of the 60s:  Jimmy Hendrix, Janis Joplin, the Doors, Bob Dylan, Van Morrison, and Elton John to mention a few. Shortly before he died peacefully in our home in Redding, California, I played his favorite song for him:  Tom Petty's Free Fallin', performed by John Mayer, accompanied by two fellow musicians, live at the Nokia Theater. Hearing that song kept David in our world a little while longer.

David's achievements are many. He was one of seven artists in Hawaii to be invited to be the Maui representative artist for the First Biennial at the Contemporary Museum of Honolulu (now part of the Honolulu Academy of Arts). David was discovered by our friend Jay Jensen, the director of the Contemporary Museum, an extraordinary man, may he rest in peace. Later, when we returned to the mainland to live in South Pasadena, Marina, owner of a gallery that rents art to the film industry in Hollywood discovered David's work. She asked him if she could use his artwork for rentals and sales in the film industry. David's art has been used in over 1000 productions:  TV shows, series, movies, and commercials. He was a member of numerous art organizations:  the Hui No'eau on Maui, Viewpoints Gallery on Maui, the Santa Barbara Printmakers, and SOPA studios in South Pasadena. David's works of art have been exhibited in numerous art gallery shows throughout the US. He had a solo show at the Kotor City gallery of Kotor, Montenegro just after Covid restrictions were lifted. Also, his works are in several museum collections in the US. In addition to his art achievements, David loved to build, to design furniture, and to work on our homes. He also loved to read novels of all sorts, and to write. And as you all know, he loved to talk.

In his 20s, 30s, and 40s, David was a runner and a member of running clubs. He ran numerous marathons, half marathons, and 10Ks. He usually finished quite well, close to the top. He loved the challenge of running to the maximum of his abilities. He also enjoyed playing tennis, following in a long line of tennis athletes in his family. Later in life he enjoyed watching the tennis masters, and many of them were his heroes.

David had a great walking stride, that easy going, confident stride of a guy who grew up in Southern California in the 60s.

Stories, there are so many! Two come to mind. The first is at the opening of the Biennial in Honolulu. We were standing in the gallery on the first floor, where David's work was exhibited. There were lots of people there. Our friend Kim was standing above us on the 2nd floor, where there was a balcony that looked down onto the exhibition and people below. She said loudly, "David!" He looked up and she dropped a lei down and over his head. It landed perfectly around his neck and joined the other leis.

The other story is one David loved to tell. It was kite day in Boy Scouts. Together with his dad, Dave built a big heavy kite out of the paper that his uncle gave him of leftovers from his printing press (he had a business that printed things like soup labels). They built their kite and the Scouts headed out to fly their homemade kites. When Dave's kite took off, it caught the wind and sailed fast up, up and away. Soon there wasn't enough string to let the kite out more. Dave's Scout buddies ran over to add string to his line. Soon, even all that string wasn't enough to hold that kite. The line went slack, the kite flew away and out of sight. Somehow that just seems so fitting for Dave, and his dad, who was very adventurous.

Lastly, Dave's high school buddies used to call him Owl, and Old Man. I guess even at a young age he seemed old. I am writing this Memoriam for David seated in a beautiful setting at the Branch House Riverfront Bistro which looks out onto the Sacramento River and the Sundial Bridge in Redding, California. Today I'm going to attend the wild animal show at the Turtle Bay Museum and Exhibition grounds; they have a new baby owl. I look forward to seeing it.

So David, on wings of Love now you are flying in the universe untethered to our physical world, free of all boundaries...Free.

Until we meet again, Your forever Pal, Meg

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The following tributes/memories are from members of Dave's family

Diane and I put our two very "twin-like heads" together to tell you how much we admire you, love you, and now miss you deeply!

Although you were six years older than us, we have many fond memories of you to hold onto! I'll share a story or two as otherwise it would turn into a book...maybe even a best seller with all of your shenanigans over the years. 

You were just starting your formative years in school (probably first grade) and Karen just a toddler, when we arrived on the scene. The "twin dynamic" just sucked the air out of the room and mom and dad had their hands full. From the very start over our first decade, we got so much attention that we want to apologize to you and Karen. That had to be so tough on the both of you when you needed dad and mom's attention and nurturing at your young ages.

As Diane and I were six years younger than you, most of our memories come to mind when we were about 8 - 10 years old. By that time you had a slew of "shenanigans" under your belt. You were so sharp and intuitive, curious, inventive, artistic, intellectual, humorous, empathetic, and caring beyond most people's abilities. That's a mouthful of adjectives Dave, but with you I could keep listing them. We remember you being quite the "jokester" of the family and you could pull some wily stunts in a myriad of ways.

One time, as dad bowed his head to lead a prayer at dinner (saying grace was often a must in those days), I was peeking and saw you putting your peas at the edge of your plate and carefully hiding them under your silverware and placing a crumpled napkin over it. That was after you had slyly dropped a few on the floor as if they had fallen. You hated peas of course and we all had to "clean our plates" because of "all those starving people" in faraway countries. We also remember mom taking care of a menagerie of teenage injuries. The Doolittle family who lived across the street (with a zillion siblings - mostly boys) were just as rambunctious as you. As we recall...a water hose fight you and one of the Doolittles' were playing cowboys wielding long hoses like lassos and you getting split across your forehead, ending up with stitches. Another time, while experimenting with your science kit in your bedroom, you decided to take long strips of the red cap gun strips and carefully for hours, remove the "gunpowder" from each cap and place it in a glass tube. You heated it up and boom...a little bomb which resulted in cuts all over your face. I can still see mom rinsing your bloody t-shirt in a bucket of cold water in the kitchen and you having several bandages on your face. Anytime we heard you say, "hey twins" we knew you had something up your sleeve. But you had such a guileless smile, you'd talk us into happily doing your chores for you. You encouraged us to swat at bees with tennis rackets on mom's prize rhododendron bush (destroying some of the flowers in the process), place coins on the railroad tracks (running behind the houses across the street) to see them come out flat and smooth and of course, we showed mom and got a lesson in "possibly derailing a train". We were thrilled when you offered us 25 cents an hour for the fun challenge of chipping and scraping the old red fiberglass paint off of your surfboard in sweltering heat. We lasted about an hour and each of us proudly received a quarter from you. The best part was you allowing us to pretend to surf by putting the surfboard in our Doughboy pool to cool off.

As the years ticked by some of our memories slipped away as we made the big move to Alaska and you went on with your endeavors. Fast forward to 2018 and I'll share a story that will stay with me and my granddaughter, Jersey (who is almost 10 years old now) for years to come. I can still picture it in my head. When Jersey was four years old, Dave and Meg joined us at our family cabin at Zephyr Point Presbyterian Conference Grounds, Lake Tahoe. David was sitting on one of the outside wooden deck benches while Jersey was playing in the sandy soil by the granite rocks and trees near the deck. Unbeknownst to Jers, David would pick up a little pebble and toss it in a perfect arc to where Jersey was playing and it would land nearby. He did this several times before she stopped what she was doing, started to look around and wonder what was going on. We were trying not to laugh and told her that the birds and squirrels must be busy. To this day, we've never revealed "the culprit". Maybe we can continue your "tradition" Dave, and continue to pull this fun little prank on our grandkids.

We mentioned that David was an artist...actually quite the printmaker (to say modestly). Dave's prints were used in hundreds of media productions. A favorite of mine is seeing one of his prints in the Netflix series 'The Lincoln Lawyer', right behind the actor, Manuel Garcia-Rulfo (Mickey Haller).

David - you've showered us with so many fun and poignant moments. Thank you for inspiring us and helping us "carve our paths" for most of our 69 years. Thank you for sharing your knowledge of life with us.

We love you and miss you David. We'll continue to share stories with you in the beautiful, billowing clouds above someday 

Char and Diane

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The following is a few words for the memory of David. I still have a big hole in the pit of my stomach knowing that Dave is no longer with us.

David, you are a beautiful man and wonderful brother. I know you can hear my thoughts for you in spirit. I knew you as a forward thinker and one as a goal setter, curious, creative, resourceful, and one to create your own path.

Even though our conversations were few and locales several miles apart, I feel you are still next door. I still smile as we must have looked like two gaunt sticks as we finished our hike into Mammoth! (And the strange yoga stretches in your tent.)

As we advance in age we realize that life can be too short and too long at the same time. You will truly be missed. I love you brother and I will see you in heaven soon (where we can resume hiking again).

Love always, Tom