South Pasadena High School
Alumni Association - 1907-2024
*Tiger Talk Forums
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Steve Ledder
Class Of '60
 Posts: 12 View Profile |
Paying My Respects Posted Wednesday, June 15, 2011 02:11 PM My dad, Ralph Ledder, died suddenly in the spring of 1953. He was buried at Forest Lawn Memorial Park Cemetery in Glendale, Ca. He left behind my mother, Lois, and sons, Steve, Fred and Dave. The news of his death hit me very hard.
 As the oldest son, at 11, I knew our dad the longest. My brothers and I did not attend his service or burial, as our mother I'm sure knew that would have been too traumatic for us to handle. My mother would go on to raise the 3 Ledder boys all by herself - no small feat.
During a period of unemployment in 1983, I decided to visit my dad's gravesite and at last pay my respects. I had been giving this thought for some years, but always put it off. Now, I had time available and no excuses to invent. I didn't tell my mother or brothers of my plan. It was something I had to do by myself.
As I drove to Glendale, my spirits were high and I was looking forward to my visit with "Daddy". Upon arriving at Forest Lawn, the lady in the kiosk at the entrance, gave me a map and traced the route I was to take to my dad's gravesite, in the Fidelity area of the cemetery. The road I took seemed to go on forever and continually uphill. At last, I reached the area and parked my car. For about 30 minutes, I tried to find the gravesite, but finally realized I was going to need help. Off to the side, about 100 yards distant, were 2 cemetery workers working on the landscaping. I showed them the map I had been given and asked for their help in locating my dad's gravesite. They kindly guided me to where I should be looking and went back to their work.
As I neared his grave, I could hear my heart pounding and pulse racing. At last, here was the final resting place for Ralph Robert Ledder. I unfolded my chair and sat there for about an hour. I began talking to "Daddy" about events of the past 30 years. At first, this was as I thought it might be. Very soon, though, I was talking thru my tears. The part about telling my dad how much I loved and missed him was too much for me to say without emotion.
 Before I left on that Autumn day I cleaned off his gravemarker and told my dad again that I, my mother and brothers love and miss him. I have been back to pay my respects several times since that day in 1983, except now I don't even have to look at the cemetery map. I know the way.
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Laurie Helene Thomas Thomsett-Seastrom
Class Of '76
 Joined: 05/03/09 Posts: 3 View Profile |
RE: Paying My Respects Posted Thursday, April 26, 2012 08:26 PM What a beautiful post....it was cathartic to read what you wrote....I hope you realized some release from your writing as well as from your visiting your father's gravesite, Steve. Congratulations on moving forward in your grief.... (I have been widowed twice and this week I am celebrating the birthday(s) of both my husbands.....) Peter R. Thomsett - 5/2/46 - 2/20/98 passed of brain cancer - Glioblastoma Multiformes, Grade 4 and..... John Mathew "Mat" Murphy - 4/24/58 - 12/10/08 passed of Anaphylactic Shock - Allergy to prescription medication given
May they both Rest in Peace.....
Sincerely, Laurie (Thomas) Thomsett-Murphy |
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